or… NLP & The Law of Attraction
“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant
the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.”
~ Napoleon Hill
Listen to those words literally – they mean exactly what they say.
With our language, we are very specifically triggering certain thoughts and emotions – programming neurons with language.
However, NLP works both ways – in and on your outside world, God, the Universe… and it works in and on you, God, and your Universe within.
It’s a major factor in your results realized by the Law of Attraction. Some wonder why the “LOA” seems so fickle or doesn’t seem to work at all. In a moment you’ll understand why.
I knew a woman once who wrote her intention to marry a rich man. A few years later she was complaining that she and her now-husband didn’t have much money. Why didn’t her intention and the Law of Attraction give her what she wanted?!? Long story short, we discovered that her husband’s name was… wait for it… Rich! She indeed got exactly what she literally asked for, but she neglected to consult with Murphy’s lawyer who most certainly would have advised her to be more careful and specific with her choices of words.
“Be impeccable with your word.”
~ from The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz
On that note, let’s consider a few common phrases in our culture used on a regular basis… Is there really a mystery as to the expected outcome?
Why don’t you…
When I hire someone to do a job, I expect it to get done. I hate hearing excuses! So why would I ask a person for a list of theirs? “Why didn’t you do this?” literally asks for a list of reasons for their failure. I DON’T CARE! What I really want to know is, “When will you…” Or, “What are you going to do to…?” Or, “What has been done so far?”
“Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not?” – George Bernard Shaw. OK, but that list can be infinite. I would amend that to say, “How can I/you/we do this?” Think about it.
Don’t worry / Don’t forget
Don’t what? In an otherwise smooth, direct communication intended to produce the desired result, introducing anything negative distorts your intention. In a world where an infinite number of things don’t work and a finite number of things do, I recommend focusing on the positive.
To demonstrate further: If you were to say, “Don’t think of a banana,” of course, you immediately and automatically think of a banana. Where did the “don’t” go? It seems to disappear and we act upon what the action the “don’t” refers to.
We’re not helping ourselves or others by unconsciously saying things like, “Don’t forget to send that FedEx.” So, “forget” is actually the subconscious command that stays in our minds. But if we were to say, “Remember to send that FedEx,” we’re actually assisting the other person by giving them a positive mental command.
For further clarification, remember to read my previous blog post, “The Trouble with Negatives”
Go for broke!
Go for broke… Now, what’s a nice guy like God going to say to that? A benevolent God or Universe would give his people what they pray for and, when you say things like ‘go for broke,’ you can expect exactly that! I realize that it’s sarcasm, perhaps intended as a joke, but the outcome isn’t usually very funny. If you say so… that’s what you’re going to get. It’s what you are transmitting to the Universe!
God might even say, “OK…
Knock yourself out!”
Really? I can imagine a variety of ways to achieve this… When we’re all looking for an easier way, perhaps it would be better to think / say, “Go for it!” Now we’re looking for the openings, moving into the open spaces, avoiding obstacles. However, just in case…
Watch your head!
Hmmm… what? I just think this is funny every time I hear it. (Perhaps this one is better saved for a discussion on zen koans – abstract ideas to ponder, but impossible in the real world.) “Watch your head!” “What?” Bam! Why is that? It makes no sense, causes a momentary brain freeze while we try to process it – In the meantime, we hit our head. Perhaps saying, “Heads up!” is a more useful command to inspire the proper reaction: immediately look up before you whack your noggin.
“Thrust, capture, spearhead…”
If you’re looking for war, what better terminology to use than from the military? The problem as I see it is, the basis of this thinking is antagonistic. It presumes some kind of ‘attack’ is required to get what you want. ‘Weapons’ are needed. Evolved beings ask nicely. While the military is rich with metaphors and some great operational practices, if you are less inclined to associate with others whose idea of working with you is to “thrust, capture and spearhead” you, you may want to change your thinking, words, and relationships.
You’re not going to believe this, but…
Oh boy, what just happened? What you’re about to tell me is “un-believable.” (I’m sure it is.) This phrase isn’t so bad – I just wanted to bring it to your attention. The trouble with hyperbole, it seems, is that not everyone can tell when it’s a joke or the truth. So, it will depend upon your audience and your desired response. This is part of being a “conscious” person – someone aware of the effect they have on their Universe and those around them.
Keep your eyes peeled
Or, “keep an eye out for…” That’s such a bad visual. Ugh! That just sounds frightening to me. I tend to visualize everything – turn what I hear into pictures. Where do phrases like this come from?!? Rather than focusing your partner’s attention on scanning the horizon, they may be distracted pondering some medieval torture device and miss what you’re looking for! Better idea: “Focus on finding…” Or simply, “Look for…”
Making an Impact
Many people say they want to “make an impact.” The movie, “Sudden Impact” is about an asteroid colliding with the Earth… From Dictionary.com, definition #1: the striking of one thing against another; forceful contact; collision: (The impact of the colliding cars broke the windshield.) Of course I know what you really mean (definition #3), but does the Universe?!? If it behaves anything like it’s best-selling product: water, it will take the path of least resistance. Is an impact really what you’re looking for? (I can already hear the crunch!) Or, is it perhaps to “have an effect on; influence; alter…”
Break it down…
Yes, I listen literally to what we’re saying. And, apparently, so does God and the Universe. There are a variety of ways to say, ‘break it down’ in a way that doesn’t leave you and your car on the side of the road. Perhaps, “Reverse engineer” “Look at the parts.” You get the idea.
Pick your brain
Bad visuals here… Open my skull and poke around with sharp tools? Use a pick-ax on someone’s head? Usually, this is a request for advice or guidance. Why scare your potential advisor with the expectation of violence? I don’t care where this idea came from, please use a different metaphor for asking for my advice!
Do you know… (sounds like no)
Ya know? Ya know what I’m talking about? You no what I’m sayin’? Especially saying it over and over again in your speaking, introduces the word and concept of “No” to the conversation. It contaminates your otherwise persuasive ideas. “It takes a single drop of oil to contaminate a barrel of fresh water.” Sure, it’s spelled differently, and we know what it’s supposed to mean, but we still hear, feel and respond to the word, ‘no.’ If you wonder if your audience is still with you, just ask. Are you still with me? Do you understand the idea. Does this make sense? If you’re just filling the silence, better to fill it with silence.
My point here is to consciously trigger the desired thoughts and emotions in others with minimum distraction. We say many funny things and the visuals we inspire are often amusing, but when you want your life to work the way you imagine, consider the requests you make and the commands you give.
Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.
This will take practice. “Give it a go” and see what happens. And remember to watch your language!
About the Author
Burke Franklin is known as the man who’s helped “launch a million businesses” since he invented business planning software with his BizPlanBuilder®. Today, his Business Power Tools™ dashboard provides instant access to apps & templates for launching, funding, and building businesses. Burke’s highly praised book, Business Black Belt teaches 100+ conscious business practices and is rich in hard-won advice for building and running a business today. Burke is also an internationally sought-after speaker for entrepreneurial events.
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I had a chuckle over your UN-believable comment.
When someone asks me How are You… I often reply – UNBELIEVABLE.
They say – Great!!
Then I ask – Do you believe that.
Reply – Yes!!
Then I respond, I guess I am not as UNbelievable as I thought!!
Few get the pun.